Hello. Devil here.
So... apparently this is supposed to be a thing now. To help break up the long breaks in between posts while Fracture the Fuck Face Guardian is out and about on some senseless suicide mission for charity, we're gonna have his newest ward/victim/pint-sized-killer make little posts and... rants... I guess.
Because that's what this is. Its a rant. And after this one I'm not so sure we'll be seeing anymore issues of 'The Jack Attack'. Because that kid has serious issues.
For the sake of style, we're gonna italicize Jack.
So... writing, writing, writing. What's the deal with writing?
Pick an emotion. Any emotion. Whatever you feel strongest about and talk about it. Stupid instructions. How about a topic next time! Jerks.
I... hate Youtube comments... I guess.
Fracture showed me Youtube. The videos are great. They're hilarious... usually. Marble hornets and the like less so. I... I'm supposed to worship a tall faceless man... but he just stands there in those videos. That not badass or scary. He should have fangs and claws and big glaring eyes or something. That stuff is scary.
I can stand! Anyone can stand! Why aren't people scared of me or each other? I mean seriously. Why doesn't someone just push him over. Hes got scrawny little leg things. I mean, sure they're freakishly long but they look like sticks. Can anyone say timber?
I mean, why does this require sages and mystics and hermits and stuff. Just push him over and put him in jail. Problem solved.
You want seriously scary? How about that tree place? The one with the ground coated in dead leaves and ash. Where everything was black and white and there were those... things running around in the distance. That shit is scary. Go put him in there. Show the tall guy what it really means to be scary. He could use a lesson in it.
How can you talk to the people who are making those videos like that? Like they owe you something. Like you know better than the guy sitting there recording the stuff. They don't owe you anything. You should feel lucky they still make shit for such horrible on lookers.
You know the farmer doesn't need the cow. He can always kill the cow for profit and go get a new cow. These people don't need to make these videos. They can move on. They can fucking kill you and be better off for it with a fresh start.
Everyone will be better for it. Everyone will be happier.
Show some gratitude. Jerks.
Creepy little shit isn't he?
Devil, outty 9000.
Happy hunting. Happy running.