So I've been to the tower, something any of you who watch static likely already know. For those of you who don't or can't, that means you didn't see the interview so I'll post that on here later. Not a video of it mind you. Just a transcript. The last thing I need is that bitch somehow taking over the blog because I was dumb enough to put her image up on it.
That would suck.
I see Ji-Je-Jack's little rant earned him a cute little two man following. Nothing quite like capturing the eye of a cabal of cow pun enthusiasts. That was certainly something... special... I guess.
He didn't seem to enthused by the response it earned though, so I don't know if we're gonna get another one of those out of him. We'll just have to see.
But enough about Jack. I'm sure you're more curious about how the trip to see Mother went. Well allow me to elaborate on that with a painfully long cut away explaining far more than you likely actually care to know.
The trip to see her is rough. I only know of one connecting path between the Path of Black Leaves and the Screaming Tower and its typically surrounded by particularly warped denizens. I cannot say who the denizens serve. Denizens are Father's by their very nature but some of the ones that watch this location have strings hanging off them. Some of them have patches of cloth sown over parts of their body that lack skin. Some of them have limbs missing with wooden replacements where those limbs should be. That whole little area features awkward hybrids of elements from Frather's realm and Hers.
I think the most notable of these awkward element blends is the 'door' itself. In this little spot, consisting of two trees surrounded by these extra grotesque denizens, is a single bright red string. This string starts on one branch of one tree and travels from the trunk, up the branch, to a point where that branch intersects with a branch from the other tree, and then travels down this second branch to the trunk of the second tree.
If you walk under the arch this string travels between the two trees, you will find yourself standing before the grand spectacle that is the Screaming Tower. Now you need to stop here and turn around and examine your surroundings to make sure you can find this spot again.
This location is harder to find on her end. When you turn, you'll find yourself in front of a small tree. This tree will be the home to many vultures and to many dolls whose strings are tried to the tree's branches. The dolls will likely be screaming in agony, like most of the poor souls that get hung outside of the tower as living decorations.
This sounds like a notable location but its really not. Its painfully similar to anything else that exists just outside the screaming tower. Being a roost for Patchwork Vultures and a hanging place for dolls is about the norm outside. What makes this tree special is the leaves. This tree, has black leaves. And when you notice them, and not a second before, they'll start to fall. They'll endlessly drop from the branches and disappear right before they hit the ground.
Those leaves are your exit from this place. If you catch one before it can disappear, you'll find yourself /somewhere/ in the path. As best that I can, I've never used this exit and arrived in the same place twice. I'm not sure why. Then again, I don't see why I should see that as odd when all of this is kind of fucking crazy.
Now a word of caution to anyone stupid enough to want to try this, clear your schedule. It is nothing short of impossible to find two specific trees in the Path of Black Leaves if you don't already know where to look. And getting past the Denizens isn't exactly a picnic either. I was nearly impaled by the horned one with the spider legs. God help you if the one with hooves and that fucking tentacle arm get you. Its taken to ripping off limbs and beating that limb's previous owner to death with said limb.
Its not a pretty sight... I don't take others with me on this trip anymore.
Getting to the Path from the Tower isn't any easier. The Dolls and Vultures that watch the tree do virtually everything in their power to make sure you can't catch a leaf. Vultures catch leaves and claw at your flesh. Dolls grab at you. The higher ones that can't reach you grab at and swat leaves in a effort to keep them away from you. Its a ridiculous fucking mess.
I actually tried to fish a leaf out discretely when I left this time using a fishing pole from higher up on the tower. I was pulled down by the line by one of the dolls. I was fortunate enough to have managed to to catch a leaf as I was falling before I hit the ground. When I was sent to the path, all that downward momentum shifted sideways. I was literally flung back into the path as a result. I landed pretty hard on my face. Thankfully, I skid across ash, dust, and fucking wood so I was mostly fine.
As an aside, I discovered something interesting about the vultures that guard the leaves on my way to the tower this time. I couldn't check many of them because they were attacking me, but I noticed each one had a black leaf sown into their patch work design somewhere. Its small and subtle, but its interesting to note that the creatures watching the tree on Mother's ended are being corrupted by Father's influence like the denizen that watch the door on Father's end are being corrupted by Mother. It makes me wonder if there is anything off about the Dolls hanging on the tree there.
One last important note about the location guardians. It doesn't matter if you're a proxy, a hollow, a chosen, or a willing Doll. These corrupted monstrosities attack on sight. As best I can tell, there are no exceptions.
So... that was how the trip went. I had to deal with all that bullshit.
We'll get into the transcript and any tedious information I can divulge about my actual stay next time.
the Lord Guardian Fracture is out. (I'm off to ice my ears.)