Friday, February 24, 2012

Cuddles and Rainbows

Please ignore the title. My overseers are a little bit sore at me still and apparently one of them thought this was funny. My first instinct was to throw this machine at the wall. I actually did that. Can't see in the corner of the screen anymore.

It occurs to me that this is what they're looking for. Reasons to cut me lose. I'm trying not to give them but it's difficult. I'm calmer then I have been in two years but all I can think about is how much I want to break the doctors bones. I want to hear them snap. I slug him whenever hes stupid enough to make eye contact. I'm finding it hard to stop at a slug though. He's fortunate to have caught on. I need to stop hurting my help but he keeps pissing me off. I had friends once,... I couldn't have always been like this. Right?

The doctor deserves at least as much as I've given though. I'm almost certain.
All that aside I'm actually feeling pretty good. Stitches are holding and I can see properly again. I would be absolutely peachy if I could take down this stupid blog. I hate that this is seen. I promised I wouldn't try to scare off viewers anymore but I have a panic attack every time I see that I have more views. I dig my nails into my flesh every time I see a new comment.

I'm told this will help in the long run but I think they just want to see me destroy myself slowly.
They believe my mental break down was caused by my Anthropophobia. Its a fancy word. It means people are monsters and can't be trusted. I could see where they might think that's what caused it.

They gave me rules.
1. I must follow 6 blogs at any one time.
2. I must respond to any post I read reguardless of how inappropriate that might be.
3. I must post on this blog atleast once a week.
4. I must respond to any comment made on this blog reguardless of how inappropriate that might be.
5. No more profanity. This is also rule 6 though 10.

I'm told failure to obey will end in punishment.
I have no friends, possessions, or position. I would hope that means humiliating me further but I halfta assume that will get old. So if I piss them off enough they'll probably just off me. I hope the doctor gets to do it. He has to want to by now.


  1. *he's, *given, though, *hate that this is being seen, *at least, *this blog,, *regardless, *have to.

    A shame that you're being forced to do this, though it does sound quite familiar. Yes, I do hope you realize what I'm intoning. If Writer was ever present on a timely basis, I'd assume he'd admonish your superiors for not thinking of their own "Cool and unusual punishment". Sorry, "Cool and unusual punishment~".

    He'd most likely be crushed. Or not; since I am not a psychopath, it is rather hard for me to figure out what he's feeling.

    (Also, to clarify, that double comma is not an error on my part. It's completely intentional. Just as I expect the mistakes were in the first place.)

    1. Joseph, you scare me. You scare me so much I don't actually see your words when I first read them. It doesn't matter what you say. I keep seeing threats.

      I'm a brain damaged goldfish. I can't even understand the clues you think you're seeing as you lay them out for me. How could I have put them there.

    2. Simply stating that your situation is similar to my situation. Startlingly so, in fact.
      ... the people They recruit these days....

    3. You have no idea the peace I find in those words. I was driving myself crazy. Crazier anyways.

  2. Ugh. Basically, they're assigning you a role to play. Sounds more like Nightlanders on a caffeine high than Highers handing out assignments. They must really not like you.